Top 10 Best Chuck Norris Facts
Top 10 Best Chuck Norris Facts: 35 items ranked by popular vote. Browse more in Humor.
📊 35 items
🗳️ 0 votes
🔀 0 remixes
#1
0
Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim on land.
#2
0
If Chuck Norris falls into a river, he doesn't get wet. The river gets Chuck Norrised.
#3
0
Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now just The Islands.
#4
0
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
#5
0
Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
#6
0
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
#7
0
Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer. It's a shame he's never cried.
#8
0
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep at night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
#9
0
Chuck Norris converted God to atheism.
#10
0
Behind Chuck Norris' beard, there is no chin, there is only another fist.
#11
0
There is no Ctrl button on Chuck Norris' keyboard. Chuck Norris is always in control.
#12
0
Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd. No one fools Chuck Norris.
#13
0
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals that Chuck Norris allows to live.
#14
0
If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on Google, it doesn't ask what you meant
It simply comes back as RUN.
#15
0
Chuck Norris got stabbed by a knife. After two weeks of pain, the knife died.
#16
0
Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills people.
#17
0
When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he doesn't push himself up. He pushes the world down.
#18
0
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
#19
0
Chuck Norris clogs the toilet every time he pisses.
#20
0
Chuck Norris invented the spoon. Killing with a knife was too easy.
#21
0
Chuck Norris died ten years ago. The Grim Reaper just can't build up the courage to tell him.
#22
0
Toronto made a replica of Chuck Norris's penis
They just used his initials and called it the CN Tower.
#23
0
Chuck Norris knows Victoria's Secret.
#24
0
Chuck Norris can speak braille.
#25
0
Chuck Norris doesn't tea bag girls. He potato sacks them.
#26
0
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars. That's why there are no signs of life there.
#27
0
Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
#28
0
Chuck Norris invented black
In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.
#29
0
Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
#30
0
Chuck Norris gave birth to himself.
#31
0
God said "Let there be light," Chuck Norris said "Say please."
#32
0
The first giraffe was created when Chuck Norris uppercutted a horse.
#33
0
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story
Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
#34
0
Chuck Norris and Mr
T once walked into a bar together. The bar immediately exploded, for that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
#35
0
Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.
📋 Embed this ranking on your site
+ Suggest an Item
Think something's missing? Add it to the list.
Think something's missing? Add it to the list.